What is Respect?

Respect, wow I've really picked a huge subject here!

So what is respect? This would be an easy answer if everyone admired and respected the same traits. Some people cheer at what I consider to be barbaric men and chastise fair and honest men. Kindness is often described as weakness and being cold blooded as something to be desired. So to try and answer the question what is respect may be a bit optimistic.

Wikipedia's definition of respect is very ambiguous and in my opinion fails to get the meaning across so I believe its down to personal interpretation.

Personally, I respect people who can teach me something, People who have achieved a personal goal, people who are truthful. I respect people who are focused. I respect people who give more than they take. I respect people who know who they are. A person doesn't have to possess all of these traits rolled into one in order for me to respect them, I respect people on a individual basis. Its difficult to get your head around and its different for everyone.

Anyone who demands respect is often getting confused with tolerance, they lack the first golden rule - respect must be given in order for respect to be received.

Respect for yourself

How can you understand respect if you don't respect yourself - be confident, strong, determined, look after yourself, stay fit and healthy, lead your life as you would like others to.

Respect for your family

It goes without saying, your family brought you into this world they cared for you when you were most vulnerable, they may have let you down since but without them you would not be here.

Respect for your teacher

Knowledge is paramount, without increasing knowledge the human race cannot move forward. Your teacher is the gateway to knowledge.

Respect for other people

Act in a way that you respect other people, understand that people have different outlooks and beliefs and accept that we are all different.

Respect for property

You will have property, a phone, a computer, a car, a house or whatever!! How would you feel if your property was defaced, broken or damaged.

Respect for rules

Without rules we would live in a lawless society, we should obey rules at all times even if we disagree with them in principle.

Respect for differences

Differences equal diversity, the world would be a boring place if everything was the same.

Respect for the environment

In return for respecting the environment the environment will look after us, its not rocket science.

There are some scenarios that have unwritten rules associated with respect, you call a school teacher 'Sir' because its perceived the right thing to do - you are giving him respect! We should respect those in a position of perceived authority. A police officer should be respected because of the job they do, in return they look after us. The same applies to most employment situations, A shop keeper - in return for their service, payroll clerk because they process your money..

So is respect attributed to giving in order to receive something? No, respect can be probably closest described as doing the right thing in each situation.

In Martial Arts respect is commonly used and is sometimes confused with etiquette, both are very important and intrinsically linked. Again there are many unwritten rules in Martial Arts all considered respectful for example you always address an instructor by rank or a generic title like sensei or kru, this stems back to when hand to hand combat was used in the military.

 The systems of unarmed combat that people study throughout the world were not designed to be conducted like a spinning class where you say hi to Dave, Jon and Marcus before stepping on the bike. To make this subject even more complicated, Respect and Etiquette are also linked to formality they all overlap and its difficult to differentiate between them.

So bowing to your instructor or senior student is a formality and Martial Arts Etiquette and if performed considered respectful. Bowing before entering the mat to train is a formality to show respect for the training hall, It also shows respect for all those coming before you and shows your instructor that your leaving your ego at the door and your there to learn.

There is a general level of respect that should be transmitted between those that we train with.  We have to respect each other; this is absolutely vital. We are punching, kicking, grappling, throwing, and doing other techniques that derived from the ancient battlefield onto each other. If there isn't mutual respect we will be seriously injured.  If we do not have the proper respect for each other we might not take on the task with the correct level of seriousness required.  Mutual respect is so important in the martial arts and it must not be understated. Formalities like bowing are used to create this mutual respect as well as indicating that both parties are ready.

Rank deserves additional respect, the more people learn about an art the more respect that person warrants, a complete beginner should as a form of etiquette bow to a higher graded student because that person is not only to be admired because of an increased knowledge and ability in technique and form but also because they have become models of humility and respect within the training environment - a black belt is an example to other students.

The same applies to outside the gym, someone who has become a model citizen and treats others with humility, who applies etiquette and formality to everyday life and has something to teach, a person of authority should be treated with utmost respect. The respect you chose to give depends on the person who you are offering It too, a simple thank you or a bow will be at your discretion.